Thursday, January 8, 2009

Polygamy!

OK, I'm confused. So this guy in B.C. gets arrested for "practising polygamy", that is, being married to 22 women at once. And I'm confused as to how this is even possible. I am in the process of becoming legally married this summer. And there are a ton of hoops you have to jump through in order to be considered legally married in the eyes of the law, and the government, and so forth. You have to fill out a bunch of forms, many of which state that you are not currently married to anyone else. And there are only a few institutions that can marry you such that your union is recognized as a "marriage". Like, City Hall, and a bunch of churches.


So how is it that these guys could have so many wives? Sure, according to their religion, they are married several times over. But these marriages couldn't possibly be recognized by our law or our government, which pooh-poohs the whole idea of marrying more than one person at once. So how can this happen? Aren't these people, in the eyes of the law, not "technically" married anyway? So who cares? Frankly, who cares anyway? As long as there isn't any of that creepy cult stuff happening with children, go for it. Do your thing. Big deal.


So here's my plan. (I'll have to ask my girlfriend if she's OK with this.) After I get married in the summer, I will invite 21 other women to move into my house as well. I will treat them the same as I treat my wife, and I will claim them as dependants on my taxes (I hope they have jobs though...I don't make enough money to provide properly for that many babes). Then if the government comes calling, I will point out that I am married to only one woman, but I have twenty-one mistresses. And that it isn't a religious thing at all, I'm just greedy. And all is legal and above board. On second thought, maybe I won't ask my girlfriend. Maybe it'll just be a surprise.

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