Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The bigwigs arrive

So yesterday, when all the big bosses arrived in town, and we stuck around after work for a meeting, I was wearing pants. Much to my own dismay, I must add. It turns out that had I been pantsless, or my pants had been deemed inadequate for such an occasion, I would have been forcibly removed from the building, and as such would have been able to avoid the meeting altogether.

I was still, along with Randall, the most under-dressed person for the meeting. When someone from high up in the company arrives, it has somehow become de rigeur for people who ordinarily wear what they feel like wearing to get dressed up in suits and ties with shiny shoes and brand new haircuts. I don't quite understand this. Maybe the idea is that someone who is so high up in the company that he doesn't know who I am or what I do will see me, and say to himself, "boy, do I ever like the cut of that man's jib. And what a super blazer. I must promote him, whatever it is that he does".

So now everyone in the building (except for the Doc and Woody show and a few straggling producers) is now dressed like our sales people. The big cheese couldn't tell us apart anyway...whatever. And I don't begrudge the sales people for dressing in suits each day. They're sales people. It's what they do. What I find most amusing now though, is that now that our bosses are in the building for their once-a-year visit, everyone is now talking like the sales people. "I have a question about pushing our brand forward." "How can we best maximize our earning potential vis-a-vis..." And these are NOT the sales people. It's everyone.

I think the main reason for all this is that as a company we present a unified front. The big guys come in once a year, every time they come the office looks and sounds like this, and they think "wow, this must be what it's like all the time! I would have thought a radio station would be a lot more slovenly and rowdy, with more disreputable types. But it looks like there are only four, standing over in that corner. Tremendous!"

The meeting itself was rather dry, except for the moments where everyone laughed at what I think might have been jokes by the boss, but I was in the corner scarfing pastries as quick as I could, and I never heard them. But what happened after the meeting made me smile quite a bit.

Apparently, once the paeons and slobs had dispersed, the REAL braintrust had a meeting of their own to go over real topics. Our top sales guys, Jeff Brown, our General Manager, and all the bigwigs from other parts of Canada. One of these real topics, it turns out, was the downloading and playing, on a big screen, of my ass-painting video from the Doc and Woody Fun Page. They may not have known who I was before...but that video will leave an indelible impression in any brain, and that impression may be positive or extremely negative. When Jeff told me he had shown it to the bosses, my first question was "am I fired?" But it must have gone OK. The big bosses say my naked butt, witnessed my disturbing and gross extra-curricular activities, and I still have a job. Banzai! Now I wait to see what happens if they read my blog.


  1. Ya know, maybe I just have a strong stomach or something, but I didn't find your video that bad. The way you described it, I was really expecting something nasty. Or maybe that was the plan... hype it up bigger than it is to prevent your readers/listeners from spewing chunks. Good plan.

    Don't get me wrong. It's not like I enjoyed watching it or anything like that. O_o

  2. Don't lie to liked it...OK, I'm really hoping that's not true. I expect the hype worked. Although I wouldn't wish a 1 minute 11 second viewing of my fat ass on anybody.