Tuesday, January 30, 2007

My creepy pictures

There are pictures of me on the Doc and Woody Fun Page that, frankly, creep even me out. The pictures from the polar bear dip, that feature me, naked, with large (or not so large) yellow blotches over my junk. I find them fairly unpleasant to the eye. As do most people.

Not one woman, apparently, who called in this morning. Taken in, I assume, moreso by the size of the yellow blotches than by the sight of by corpulent naked body, this woman wanted to know if the originals were available anywhere. Even for purchase, she said!

The originals ARE available, but I wouldn't wish those on anybody. And, although I hate admitting this, the yellow blotches in the pictures ARE kinda doctored. The real pictures themselves would be a fairly large disappointment to this woman. Or a fairly small one.

I spent some time this morning mulling over this poor woman, who obviously suffers from some defect, either a mental one or a vision-related one. Then I realized that if anyone I know has a complex, it's porno guy Jason. I mean, promo guy Jason. Not only did he have to take the pictures, but he also had to edit them. Which means he had to look at me, au naturel, for quite some time.

Jason may now have a substantial complex due to these events. My main reason for believing this is that not only are the original naked Eric pics still on his camera, they are also still on his computer. A normal person would have deleted them by now. So...either he's planning to blackmail me later, which is scary, or he really likes the pictures, which is scarier.

2 comments:

  1. Eric... no offence, but I am still haunted by those junk-doctored images. And I thought the figure skating ones were bad.

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  2. Yep. Anything that makes someone long for those pink frilly freak pictures MUST be obnoxious.

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